if you have ever read anything i have written on the internet, chances are it was about wafels. specifically, wafels & dinges. one year ago, i won pretty much the greatest competition ever, held by pretty much the greatest company ever, run by pretty much the greatest people ever. tomorrow is national waffle day, and i will have to give up my crown. it will be tough, but it’s only fair that someone else get a shot. it’s been an honor.
here are a few reasons why you should consider vying for the 2012 wafel title:
- unlimited free super-delicious wafels…this requires no explanation and the amazingness of it cannot be stressed enough. seriously. probably the greatest thing you will ever eat.
- a sash and a tiara…that you may have to wear all day long at work after you win, since it was the part of the deal you made with your boss. real life conversation - me: “oh, right, so, um, i need to take a longer lunch tomorrow…i’m partaking in a curbside competition in attempt to win the prestigious title of Miss Wafel and to win a year of free wafels. i can stay later or something to make up the time… ” boss: “…that’s amazing. take as much time as you want. but if you win you have to wear your crown for the rest of the day.” me: “DEAL.” and so it was worn. with pride.
- a certificate….that i may or may not have framed. and that may or may not have been the first thing several people asked about after my apartment burned down. (yeah, that happened). yes, it was one of the things i took when we were allowed to go in and salvage things. yes, i realize that’s kind of crazy. but come on, it’s a wafel certificate, people.
- a wafel passport... that you can sometimes use for access to things. i had to go into a fancy building in nyc. they needed a photo id to let me in (to be fair, i am apparently quite suspicious looking. just ask the airlines that always search me). i said, “hmm, i have a photo id that entitles me to a year of free wafels, will that work?” they looked confused, then said, “yeah, that’ll work…free wafels, huh? wafels & dinges…ok go ahead.” PERMISION TO ENTER AND SECRET WAFEL BUZZMARKETING. i also came thisclose to presenting my wafel passport in lieu of my actual US passport at passport control in Brussels last week. but due to my aforementioned tendency to arouse suspicion in airports, i decided it was probably not worth the risk. i had only a layover in belgium and needed to eat some wafels and drink some beer. so i wussed out. sorry everyone. next time?
- a weird mixture of awe, admiration, respect, jealously, and slight confusion from everyone who knows you… i don’t think i will ever do anything that will create more pride or happiness in my friends. and i am a pretty ok type of person. it’s just THAT impressive to all other humans.
- mild internet fame…sometimes you get retweeted by people THAT DON’T EVEN KNOW YOU PERSONALLY. it gets crazy like that. also, i don’t think i will ever get more facebook excitmement than i did the day i announced that i won. it will be a little anti-climactic if i get engaged or have a baby. and those are undeniable facebook activity generators. sorry potential future babies, you’re just not that exciting anymore.
- tweets from celebrities… who are equal fans of delicious flavor.
- conversation starters and savers… don’t have anything to talk about? did things just get weird in the conversation and it got all quiet because that one kid said that totally inappropriate thing again? save these moments and amaze and confuse your friends by abruptly announcing that you are food truck royalty who gets complimentary wafels. works every time. and it’s definitely made me some new friends.
- knowledge…because you might be the only who who spends an hour googling wafels and belgium (that king leopold i is a looker) the night before national wafel day, but HEY, now you know things. oh, and also, you won. because being clearly overly prepared may be awkward, but sometimes, just sometimes, it gets you a whole lot of wafels.
- easy solutions to presents for people…this is what i gave a bunch of family members for christmas last year. yeah, that’s right. wafels, speculoos, and, yes, that IS an autographed photo of miss wafel and the wafel man, thomas degeest. (autographed only by me, obviously, so it is of no actual value.) and yeah, sorry thomas, i think there is a photo of you hanging in the office of all of my relatives. so that might be weird. it happens. the best part is that i think everyone liked this more than any present i have ever given before. and i’ve made some really nicely crafted, artisanal, glitter puff-paint christmas sweatshirts as a young child. i’m talking about some really fashionable stuff here. so it can’t be that i just gave bad presents, the whole miss wafel thing just makes people really happy.
- photos with strangers on food tours…i am fairly certain i am in a framed photo in idaho and south africa right now. i had run into the guy who operates the downton manhattan food tours enough that i sort of organically became an additional part of the tour when i was there at the same time. i think this is stellar. i hope i gave them a story to tell.
- song-writing (parodying) opportunities… yup.
- ways to spice up the work day… i searched ‘wafel’ in my work outlook, and i have literally 902 emails that come up. frankly, i think this is a bit low. some of them include really technical windows paint pictures like this.
- the company of great people…everyone who works at the wafel truck is a nice, fun person. they have fun challenges every day (see ‘songwriting opportunities’) that you can participate in to get a free topping. they make jokes. they ask you about your day. they give back to the community. they encourage creativity. going to the truck is about wafels, yes, but it’s mostly about fun. plus i could take up a good deal of your time talking about how thomas degeest is pretty much my hero. way to not let The Man keep you down and do something that brings you - and everyone around you - fun and happiness.
- fun and happiness… because that’s what life is all about. and wafels & dinges is a pretty simple way to inject some extra happiness in your life.
this was my attempt to keep this short (and i really have reined it in a bit). so, i clearly have failed. but the thing is, if i really like something - i mean REALLY like something - i want to tell everyone about it so they can like it too. so i get a little overexcited about wafels & dinges. even if you don’t want to run for the wafel title (crazy), you should really do yourself a favor and at least go out there and give the truck a visit.
to me, the main point of wafels & dinges is to make people happy. they are smart, witty, fun, kind, excellent people with a fantastic product and they honestly just want to make you happy. and they do. every time.